Sunday, November 21, 2010

My new favorite TV show Modern Family because Dancing With The Stars is dead to me this season

Modern Family is my new favorite show. It won't be reviewed weekly because the shows I pick to review, I usually make fun of, reality TV comes to mind. So I'll probably wait for the new season of Survivor to start, because the spoilers I hear coming from the Survivor spoiler camp are going to be too good to pass up, we're talking a jump the shark event of biblical proportion. I'm not sure when the next season of Survivor starts as the season now is only half way through.
There will be a lot of reruns starting during the blessed holiday season so I will try to keep you amused with my quick wit. We will go into indepth discussions on commercials and TV clips like this one from the latest episode of Modern Family, my new favorite TV show.

Friday, November 19, 2010

I can't believe I just wrote that

I've made up my mind. I've thought about this all week. Dancing With The Stars is my very best source of mindless entertainment. I can put the show on and be wildly entertained, forget the world around me; work, the global warming scam, the threat of the U.S. economy coming to a crashing halt, the Iranians nuking us and what to wear to the Christmas party.
Somehow, somewhere, sometime, somebody ruined my favorite show. It's obvious the judges are bias and trying to steer the show into predetermined direction. I understand they are judges but they don't have to be rude, Bruno. I'm tired of the same guy, Derek, making it to the finals every season. I can't stand Lacey, she's full of herself and Mark is almost as annoying as Derek. I watch the show because the dancers have become my stars. I barely know who these stars are half the time they are introduced season after season.
This season burst my Dancing With The Stars bubble. So 'Show' get it together next season. I know you've lost fans this season, I read the message boards. Think about this, really think, what "star" is going to want to be on Dancing With The Stars after this season? What "star" is going to want to devote months of busting their asses, risking injury to be ridiculed and given the shaft for ratings? Seriously, they have better ways of jump starting their careers that are a lot easier. They can admit a drug problem and go into rehab, write a book about their broken childhood, drive drunk, relapse and go back into rehab.
Please bring back the show I use to love'
What did I make my mind up about? I won't be watching the season finale. And I can't believe I just wrote that.

Tuesday, November 16, 2010

The worse final three in Dancing With The Stars history

I took notes and sat through this whole damn show to see the worse final three dancers assembled ever. I knew it was going to happen but I watched anyway. Maybe tomorrow I'll write the review, tonight I'm to cynical to write it. I took this season way to seriously, it's just a stupid reality show.

Monday, November 15, 2010

It's the Dancing With The Stars Sob Story Episode

It appears Maks and Carrie Anne have kissed and made up or were told to shut up. The Latin dances are first tonight on Dancing With The Stars and the stars have to dance a little solo during this first dance. Brandy and Maks received all 9's. Which was fair, their dance didn't seem to have that wow factor. Come on Maks step it up, it's the semi-finals and you've never won the giant mirror ball trophy. I'm disappointed, especially since Diva and Derek got a perfect score of 30. I'll have to admit, it was a pretty good Cha-Cha and we saw no crying or limping so far. What angle is she going to play this week?
I'm totally expecting Bristol to crack under pressure and suck, but look at her go, she's so cute. All 9's? Tied with my Maks? I'm nervous. The chubby couple is next, jeez it's got to be my new TV. Everyone looks heavier. It's HD, LED wide screen something, it's bothering me more than a little bit.
Okay, now we're getting ready for the ballroom dances but first before every dance we get to see an up close and personal package of "who's gone through the most drama in their life" nonsense. Cry me a river. They are playing with our emotions and toying with us. Can't they just dance? Kyle has absolutely no drama to dwell on, try as he might he can't compete with being accused of murder, being called an unwed slut or having a broken neck. They showed us some run down apartment buildings that he probably didn't live in.
Brandy and Diva both received perfect scores, Bristol is in last place.....again.
I think the judges have anointed Diva the chosen one and I'm scared for Maks. Bristol doesn't belong in the finals but I think she'll be there. I'm thinking Brandy or Kyle will go and that's a shame.

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

Dance Center, It's Time For Dance Center!

Let me just start off by saying the husband is watching Dancing With The Stars Results Show with me tonight. My notes are a mess. The husband would rather stick a fork in his eye than watch Dancing With The Stars. But both of us are to tired to get off the couch. He's decided to sit through "an hour of torture". I think he just misses me. But I wish he'd shut up, he's a major distraction.
Lacey and Kyle got the encore dance, meh, it's the instant dance, oh and they are safe, gah!
Kenny Maine, Jerry Rice and Len are the highlight of the results shows, it's the only one I look forward to. Maybe Kenny Maine can take Brooke Burkes place. Hey, I think I'm on to something here. Okay there are two guest singers and I don't know their names. "What did they just call him?'" I asked the husband. "Huh?"
OMG, do you see those cute kids? Two little mini dancers couples and one mini pianist, average age maybe 12ish. I think one of these little couples was on America's Got Talent, I'm sure of it.
Not only did the husband distract me while Dancing With The Stars was on, but now he's decided to sing while I write. There is definately something wrong with him tonight.
Okay Lacey and Kyle are safe and so are Diva and Derek. Then to the amazement of the entire universe Bristol is proclaimed safe. Jesus, Mary and Joseph, Maks and Brandy are in jeopardy along with Kurt and Anna. If Maks is gone this week I will forever hate Carrie Anne Inaba, forever. She tries to get the last word in while Maks is standing under the red light waiting his fate, by telling him she has always respected the Pro dancers. Right, just some more than others.
Kurt, the charming one is going home, I said I would be sad but thank God it's him and not Maks.
"You think he's hot?"
"Dear God yes, he's a babe."
I tell him this only because he once told me if Meg Ryan ever came knocking on our door he'd kick me to the curb.

Maks and Carrie Anne Smack Down

This is the argument I spoke of in my last post between Maksim Chmerkovskiy and Carrie Anne Inaba. It was great. Carrie Anne is such a Jennifer Grey lover and it shows in her judging. Maks doesn't take any crap and said, "Give us a 7 then." Almost daring her. She gave them a 9 and I can guarantee if they stay in it after tonight's elimination show Maks and Brandy won't be receiving any 10's from Carrie Anne anytime soon.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Dancing With The Stars Insta Dancing and all that messing about

Honest to God I can't tell if Kyle and Lacey are dancing well because I can't stop looking at Lacey's mess of a dress. What the hell's going on with it? It's indescribable. First of all it makes her look 67 pounds heavier. They are now the chubby couple. Seriously, he hasn't lost any weight and she looks like she's gained, well 67 pounds. Maybe it's my new TV.
Diva Grey is next and it appears we are going to hear about how her body is falling apart. Really? Wouldn't it be great if people stopped voting for her and put her out of her misery? Dare to dream. OMG, enough already, a doctor visits during practice and tells Diva that her knee is ripping apart. Her father, Joel Grey, huh, he's still alive, stops by practice and tells her the show must go on. And she tells us she must dance for her daughter. She's covering all the bases. Florence Henderson tried that Jennifer. Of course the judges love her and we get to see a replay of rehearsal where she miserably limps off the dance floor. Are we watching a woman fall apart on live television or an Oscar winning performance?
Kurt and Anna, he's so charming. He's not going to win and knows it. I've decided I like him and will be sad when he leaves.
While these dances are going on the couples that have already danced are practicing for their instant dance. The next stupid twist this season. They don't get their music until after their last dance and have 20 minutes to put the dance together, they just know what kind of dance. All the makings of a train wreck.
Kurt and Anna get all 8's, third place so far. But Bristol still has to dance. She's getting her freak on and tied with Kurt. Mark and Bristol make it back to be painfully interviewed by Brooke Burke. They pick their music and, this is awesome, walk away from Brooke's outstretched arm with the microphone she holds onto for dear life, just dangling in mid air. And she continues to smile.
Ah Maks, oh and Brandi too. They dance an awesome waltz and the judges love them. Almost a perfect score, 29, they are in the lead.
So now we have the instant dance and I don't know if I'm going to like all this messing about. But as it turns out they're really good. Good enough that Derek and Diva get a perfect score and amazingly Diva is jumping up and down on the ripped up knee, she's such a trooper.
Kurt and Bristol give a great effort but they get the lowest scores of the night. Maks and Brandi do the Cha Cha, but start off sitting on the steps and this sends a bug up Carrie Anne's butt. She and Maks go at it talking at the same time so I don't know what either of them said but I think Maks won. He got the last word in back during the Brooke Burke interview, after they got their score which tied them with Diva and Derek.
I'm looking forward to Dance Center tomorrow and hopefully the Macy's dancing people will stay home.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Dancing With The Stars and Election Coverage Done Good

An hour and a half? Dancing With The Stars is stretching out the results show for an hour and a half? Oh I see, how considerate. ABC is allowing for election coverage. Maks and Brandy are safe! Bristol and Mark are in jeopardy. I can not think of one person who would be surprised by that.
The Macy's Stars of Dance are killing sometime. Am I the only one that finds them a total bore? We got to see Marie Osmond faint again. That just never gets old, ha. She won most Dramatic Award. Dancing With The Stars is giving out awards. Huh.
Election Coverage
Taylor Swift, is she suppose to be good?
Another award, Best Worst Dancer. There have been a lot of stars that have sucked over the years, I don't know how they narrowed it down. My vote would have been for Master Do Woop Diddle (he doesn't deserve a link) he annoyed thhe hell out of me. Kenny Maine won it though, I love him and his humor.
Brooke is interviewing badly again. Please let this be her last season. Diva Grey is crying some more and we get to see more crying next week because she's safe. Rick Fox is in jeopardy, he's a stiff, he should be in jeopardy.
Can I just break off from my review to let you know that I have been exiled to the bedroom to watch Dancing With The Stars on the small TV. The husband is watching constant election coverage and claimed the new TV. The dog, who is also a Dancing With The Stars fan, is watching with me. Well she's trying to, she must have had a rough day. I let her know when they proclaim safety and jeopardy, she doesn't have time for the rest of this nonsense.
Rod Stewart is singing an old song, not one of his old songs, just an old song. Is he almost done?
Let's watch some crazy judge's moments.
Election coverage. What kind of crazy ass moron do you have to be to vote for Dennis Kucinich? ABC is handling one of TV's top rated shows and election coverage very well, I'm impressed.
Kyle is in jeopardy. Look, the bottom three couples in jeopardy are from the "Team Kristi" group dance.
So how tall is Taylor Swift? Tom Bergeron is standing next to her and he looks short. Maybe he's just short. But this is the first time I've noticed. Taylor Swift is tall.
The dog is totally out, I'm beginning to think she doesn't care who gets eliminated.
Holy Crap, Bristol's safe, this is going to piss off a lot of people. I can't wait to get on the message boards tomorrow. Oh boy, Carrie Ann Inaba is going to need a sedative, Rick Fox has been eliminated, she has it bad for Rick. I'm surprised, I thought Bristol or Kyle would go.
Until next week, the dog and I are tired.

Monday, November 1, 2010

The 200th Episode Frigging Extravaganza

Holy Crap! We're starting at the end. For years I have watched Derek Hough nervously tap, tap, tap, tap his dancing partners shoulder during the judging and interviews to the point that I want to smack him, hard. Tonight Diva Grey snapped, she smacked his hand away and said. "STOP IT!" Finally.
You'd think someone would have said something by now. You'd think he would have seen it on a re-cap. It isn't like they don't ever replay anything.
There were team dances tonight with team captains, because it was a extravaganza you know. There were stars from all the previous seasons. Star judges, who thought very highly of themselves. All the individual dances were remakes of popular dances. The hell? Every week it's a different theme or twist. The show is great, stop fixing what isn't broken.
I didn't take notes during the star studded extravanganza for several reasons. We got a new TV and for some reason we have to use two remotes, that's so 1990's. I couldn't get the right channel on and panicked.
"Boy #2! Boy #2! Fix the TV! Dancing With The Stars started."
"Fix the TV. The TV! Put Dancing With The Stars on!"
"Oh." He then went on to explain what went wrong and I told him to shut up so I could watch. I have no patience when I'm sick, that's my other reason for no notes. And also the dog decided to snuggle up to me on the couch. Unconditional love baby, she don't care about no stinking blog.
Brandy and Diva are tied for first and Bristol Palin is in last place. Bristol should go home tomorrow. But she seems to have a huge fan base and that's saying a lot in Hollywood. America is speaking up finally.